Posts Tagged Dreams
Death in a dream
If death were to mean that i could dream forever, than i wouldn’t be afraid of it.
Dreams are beautiful because of their randomness, and how this fantasy world brings us up and away from reality, from the degrading and present world that seems to be falling apart day by day, even as we speak.
My dreams range from providing me with unlimited superpowers of teleportation, having an awesome romp with twins, getting my pink IC in army, my all time favourite of singing alongside Freddie Mercury and also things that should be better left unsaid.
Yet for all the fantastical tales that we can take from our dreams the sad reality is that too often, dreams can shatter us, most of the times nightmares may just stick for that sudden 5 seconds when you are awake. Yet personally for me, i’ve unfortunately have had dreams stick with me for way too long.
I’ve dreamt that i died many a time, once even by an evil wizard who casted a sort of Avadakadabra spell one me.
I’ve ever dreamt my dad died from a double barreled shotgun, i’ve experienced many friends and family dying from totally irrelevant issues and causes and i had many reaffiriming situations in the area of love’s lost and found that make me wake up, take a look in the mirror and tell myself that for that point of time, i am the biggest loser on the planet.
Recently i’ve been trying to create dreams that only i want to dream about, by thinking about a certain situation or a certain individual all the way, till i feel groggy enough to get to sleep. This is usually accompanied by the situational music that always is one my playlist from 11pm onwards everynight.
Somehow for this current situation that i am in, it actually works as i’ve come to think about it each time i fall asleep, most of which ends in happy oblivious scenarios, making me elated for the day ahead but also making the complications all the more hard to swallow.
It’s my little own experiment of mine at the moment, to see if one can actually force upon himself what he wants to dream about, by fantasing the direct issue just before he falls asleep.
I think people don’t share their dreams enough with one another for fear of embarassment, humuliation or the fact that it was so splendid and surreal that it could just never happen to them in real life.
And i never like to know about the scientific facts of it because i think somethings are just better left to our own imagination.
Take away imagination and fantasy, and you take away life.
You the only sense the world has ever made
-Soapfat
Add comment February 16, 2009
subtly perfect reconciliation
i think the title of this entry encapsulates the whole intense hour of thoughtful imagination and wishful wondering that i felt for close to an hour since i awoke from that wonderful slumber.
i feel that dreams are meant to be shared, especially when a tinge of deja vu after the dream gets you really wondering just what’s been there and the opportunity thats been missed.
There’s this girl, we’ll give her a name of Eva, who Juan was really close to back in teenage days. They did almost anything and everything together for one point of time, and i mean everything.
Whether it was a game of croquet, dining on the school meals or hanging out as any teenager would, Juan always felt that there was easily more to her than just the fun and laughter they shared together.
Juan knew that at times taking it too fast was perhaps pushing it, so he waited to see if Eva expressed similar sentiments back. He consulted his amigos and many concurred to his suggestions. He was about to express what he felt for her.
But news of a roving musketeer started surfacing and before Juan knew anything about it, Eva had fallen head over heels with this maked villan. Needless to say, Juan was heartbroken, equally devastated and felt that he had missed out on the opportunity.
But Juan took it in his stride, hid it within himself and still managed to maintain what he now felt was to turn into great friendship rather than anything else.
But jealousy doesn’t sit alone forever, the masked villan constantly reaered his dominance and unwavering power into the context of the friendship between Juan and Eva. And almost emminently, quarrels, spats, arguements and disagreements about almost everything arose between Juan and Eva, it was evident that their friendship wouldn’t be able to stand the test of that particular time.
Juan now saw Eva differently, sometimes with utter hate for her relationship with the masked villan, but deep down inside, he knew it was all the jealousy and animosity he had towards their relationship that kept them apart for considerable periods of time, with no words said between, no emotions shared together and the connection and bonds ever fazing out. For months it went on, the bonds slowly faded away and their tenure in the school ended and they went their seperate ways, perhaps never to see each other again.
Eva had to follow her family back to the wine making business in Chile while Juan was drafted to musketeer school to fight the invasion of the Dutch. But it suddenly occured that before they went their seperate ways, he had to at least say something that he never said to her.
As she was about to depart for greener pastures, Juan had a final conversation and a final phrase for her to bring over. Juan told her he loved her. To her it seemed it was love not as a partner, but as a friend. She repaid in kind and Juan knew that at least he had made peace with her, that still they could call upon each other in times of need, maybe not as a close confide, but as a friend nonetheless.
Juan wrote to her, and Eva back at times, but as the dedication towards each cause took a strain, and new associates and comrades were made along the way, the gap between the two spread wider and wider.Till this day you could say that Juan and Eva are still amigos in their own rights, but their friendship will never be what it used to be.
And then the dream.
It’s been a year to the good since Juan met Eva, but somehow on New Year’s Eve, everything he ever wondered and knew about her were all rolled into a single dream of perfect reconciliation. He bumped into her while holidaying in a distant country where she was working at, they talked all the way through the airport of the past and present, the looked at each other with intrigue for she had left the masked villan a long time ago, and he had never really fancied anyone alike ever since.
Juan can’t tell the whole dream because he only remembers the important jists of it.
the $16 flight from India to London
the 17 hour Journey towards there.
Juan awoke to the real world too fast too soon, and suddenly he was swarmped with a sense of Deja Vu through his outlet of information sources depicting her as he imagined. Coincidence, deja vu. who knows.
But it got Juan thinking all the way till this point of just everything that went on since day one.
And he has never forgotten her, and he will never ever do.
if i could turn back time, i’ll go wherever you will go
-Juan Tehchini
2 comments January 1, 2009
